MAGA Republicans eventually focused on a 10-point formula that worked to gain political and economic power. And they will never leave him.

Rather than trying to impress college graduates with knowledge of history and science, one key is to present conspiracy theories to high school graduates. Blue-collar kids were not very interested in social studies during their 12 years of schooling. The training was so boring compared to browsing the internet on their phones during class. They want crazy gossip and the more the merrier.

It is also extremely useful to falsely blame others for displaying one’s own obvious faults. This is called “projection” in the language of psychology, and “slander” in communist political science. Doing this upsets the Democrats to no end and causes them to faint with anxiety and lose sight of any plausible path to success.

Lying is telling the new truth. We have told the truth on the North American continent for 400 years, and these people are tired of it. It’s not fun at all. The road to power is very slow. We also covered meat in public places and men and women did the same.

Republicans will steadfastly keep AR-15s legal for the many mentally unstable citizens of our country to purchase and use at their own pleasure. These violent people provide nearly nightly entertainment for law-abiding citizens looking for even crazier true crime stories and reality TV. All of this anti-civic entertainment is necessary to prevent America from returning to serious participation in democracy at any level of government. Why participate if you’re going to be shattered when you go out in public? Additionally, all the blood and guts makes us want to lean on Republican despots, authoritarians, dictators, and tyrants for security because they are the only ones who can make things right.

Republicans will continue to advance the political philosophy of autocracy and monarchy. This is the idea that one person is so much more special than others that he or she should make all the laws rather than Congress making all the laws. Moreover, his DNA is key to maintaining stability in the nation, so it is surely in his best interest to hand over the reins of government to his first-born son.

Making barrels of money and thus becoming an untouchable celebrity is the only worthy path to personal success for Republicans today. Encouraging everyone to become gold diggers by investing in new forms of money and supporting crazy new technologies is the perfect response to the hard-working, science-based small business capitalism that built this country.

We must also make America a center for false advertising. If propaganda works in Republican politics, it certainly works in Republican business and banking. Marketing departments must build fantastic new fantasy worlds through advertising campaigns to marginalize the competition and achieve a monopoly in the industry. These monopolies can then more easily use the Citizens United decision to buy off the fledgling Republicans they want to see running the business.

Religion must preserve all the doctrines that theologians and politicians concocted during the Dark Ages to make the Roman Catholic church the ruler of all Europe. Citizens are supposed to swallow them whole, never bother digesting them, as this can cause alarm and insight. Protestant churches should also move toward an authoritarian system of church government that will allow them to quickly direct their members to support Republican candidates.

Republicans should double down on the problem of childless cat ladies. Those who avoid raising children do not understand the necessity of the aristocratic class and the monarchy to produce heirs to pass on their wealth. Moreover, raising children in the common class is laudable because it fills the lower class that has to fulfill the economic demands of the Republican aristocracy.

If DNA works in aristocracy and monarchy, it also works in race relations. White DNA is far superior to off-white or colored DNA. This is obvious to any MAGA cheerleader. Moreover, black people are turning to communism and this must be stopped.