Dear Annie: A few years ago my wife had a stroke. As part of his recovery, his doctor recommended a video game to help improve his hand-eye coordination. It seemed like a great idea at first; this gave him a sense of accomplishment and helped him recover. But over time, this once useful activity turned into a serious phone addiction.

He now spends about eight hours a day on his phone, playing games and surfing the internet non-stop. He eats his meals with his phone right in front of him, barely noticing me or anything else around him. I try to include him in the conversation but it’s like I don’t exist. He no longer contributes to any household chores, cooking, or activities. Most days he sits in the kitchen with his phone in his hand, watching TV and completely engrossed in his games.

What’s even harder to deal with is that he uses his phone to text family members, expressing how unhappy he is and implying that I’m somehow to blame. Now his relatives oppose me, believing that he was describing our situation without knowing the full story.

I’m at my wits end. I want to support his recovery, but his phone has taken over our lives and it feels like I’m losing my partner to a screen. I’m really considering turning off your phone as a last resort. What should I do? — At the End of My Mind

The End of Dear Mind: First of all, I am very sorry about your wife’s stroke. It must be incredibly scary and challenging for both of you. Now that he’s in recovery, he appears to have become addicted to a video game on his screen. He is not alone in this; It is well known that video game designers often deliberately make these games addictive to keep people playing.

To help your wife quit this habit, try to channel your understandable anger and frustration into a constructive solution. Have an open conversation with him. He may not even be fully aware of how much time he spends on the game. Limit the time he spends playing games and call his doctor to ask him to spend more healthy time to reduce his stress and help him recover from his stroke.

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