In 2024, women are starting to get tired of conforming to men’s standards and shaping themselves according to how they will dress and present themselves in certain environments so as not to distract men.

No one has the right to dictate what a woman wears, especially in the comfort of her own home. So what happens if another woman objects to this?

The same thing happened to a woman on Reddit who said her roommate objected to her not wearing a bra when her boyfriend was around.

A roommate asked Reddit if she was at fault for refusing to wear a bra in her own apartment.

inside AITA postThe 21-year-old said she and her 22-year-old roommate have always been close and have lived together for about four years. Six months ago, her roommate started dating one of their mutual friends, whom she named Mike, but she and Mike grew apart after she started dating his roommate.

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The young woman thinks this is “super disrespectful,” stating that Mike moved in after she and her roommate began their relationship, but he didn’t pay rent or do his own cleaning.

“I always dress very casually in my apartment,” she explained. “Bra, little top, shorts, etc. No, because I love the freedom of wearing almost no clothes. When he came I stopped wearing the little shorts, okay. But I refuse to wear a bra around my own home, and even in public I rarely wear one (I’m blessed with an A cup).

The woman felt surprised when her roommate asked if she could start wearing a bra after her boyfriend was done. “He is ALWAYS here,” the woman wrote. “So I’ll have to wear one all day and into the evening. No. I refused.

The roommate claimed it was wrong for women to dress inappropriately around other people’s boyfriends, saying the woman was disrespectful for refusing to “respect her boundaries.” But what feels more inappropriate is when the roommate tries to control how her friend should dress at her house.

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The woman stood her ground and argued that she could wear whatever she wanted at home.

As an independent young woman paying rent in her own apartment, it doesn’t seem fair that she would sacrifice her comfort for her roommate’s rent-free boyfriend, especially considering he doesn’t respect her space.

Reddit users agreed that she had every right to refuse such an unreasonable request and perhaps even notify her landlords of her unofficial move.

“It brings a man into your shared private space. “Just because you’re both paying rent doesn’t mean this is a public space,” he commented.

“She didn’t even ask if she could live there, but she’s going to say you’re disrespecting her boundaries by trying to enforce a dress code in your home? Out of touch and out of line.”

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The woman tried to disguise her unreasonable dress code request as a boundary, but it didn’t work that way.

It’s understandable why the roommate might be annoyed by her friend’s boyfriend’s choice of clothing next to her, but it’s not her place to make such a request and then label it as a “limit.”

Only Boundaries that seem to be crossed In this situation, it is the woman.

“Demanding that you dress a certain way is not a limit for him,” someone commented. “And if she wants to talk about disrespect, she also needs to talk about how disrespectful her boyfriend is treating the apartment.”

Reddit users noted that if the roommate really has an issue with her friend’s freedom in the apartment they share, then she should consider moving in with her boyfriend instead.

When it comes to boundaries, experts agree they’re important Distinguish between boundary and control behavior. In this case, a limit would be if her roommate chooses to wear a bra around men because it makes her feel more comfortable. Controlling behavior could be the roommate telling the Reddit woman that she should dress differently to make her feel more comfortable.

This is an important distinction.

Instead of putting other women down, women should hold their boyfriends accountable for self-control.

Whatever the obvious reasons why this roommate’s desire for her friend was excessive and inconsiderate, it also underscored an ongoing but outdated expectation that society continues to impose on women; A woman dictating how a man dresses to control his attractiveness.

The truth is, it’s not fair for a woman to prioritize another man’s comfort at the expense of her own. If women are concerned that their boyfriends might be distracted by other women’s attire, they should hold their boyfriends accountable and promote self controlDon’t blame women for their autonomy to wear whatever they want.

As social styles and standards evolved, many women preferred a bra-free lifestyle for the sake of comfort and self-acceptance at home and in society. In today’s generation, women hope to reduce the stigma and sexualization surrounding their breasts, and the best way to do this is through desensitization.

likewise men fought for their right to show their nipples In the 1930s, women follow their own path to secure the freedom to showcase their own style, but it becomes challenging when other women continue to do so. they subject themselves to internalized misogyny.

Self-control is a skill that anyone can achieve. If men were allowed to show their bare breasts whenever they wanted, a woman could rightfully choose not to wear a bra without being scolded or targeted, especially in her own home.

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Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango’s news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. It deals with topics of lifestyle, human interest, adventure and spirituality.