bigrus

Dear Abby: 40 years ago my husband was not receiving an inheritance. Can anything be done now?

Harry November 4, 2024

DEAR ABBY: When my husband “Sid” was a young adult, his mother died by suicide. A few years later, when the maternal grandparents died, his mother’s two siblings inherited their grandparents’ estate. Other family members commented that it seemed wrong that Sid and his sister were deprived of their mother’s share of the inheritance. Since Sid and his sister were young adults, they did not have enough confidence or support to question their aunt and uncle. Their father was out of the picture.

Forty years later, this situation is still a source of pain for Sid and his sister. They feel they have been deliberately disinherited, while their closest relatives act as if nothing is wrong. Is there a way to approach the family to relieve this pain? — WE SORRY ABOUT SID IN NEVADA

DEAR SAD: I firmly believe that ship sailed 40 years ago. However, I am not a lawyer. Your husband and your sister should ask this question to an attorney who specializes in wills, inheritances, and trusts to see what exactly happened then and whether anything can be done now to change it.

DEAR ABBY: I will be 18 in six months. I know I should be happy, but to be honest with you, I’m scared of being an adult. I don’t feel like I’m ready to grow up and leave my childhood behind. What should I do? What can I do? –HAPPY BIRTHDAY

DEAR UNHAPPY: What exactly are you afraid of? Not all people mature at the same rate. Some individuals must be over the age of 21 to assume the responsibilities of adulthood. Others are ready at the age of 18, provided that they are given some responsibilities by their parents.

The insecurities you experience are things you need to talk to them about. You can also discuss this issue with a trusted teacher or counselor at school. If you do this, you may realize that you are not alone in the emotions you are feeling.

DEAR ABBY: I’ve been unlucky in love since I started dating and I feel like I can’t put myself out there again. My last relationship looked promising — I even saw a wedding on the horizon — but my partner cheated on me and everything fell apart. I’m afraid now. This is just the latest in a long string of bad relationships. How can I keep dating when I feel so hopeless? Am I not suitable for the “married life with 2.5 children”? — FAILURE IN OREGON

Dear FAILURE: Considering your mindset, I’m not sure you should date right now. Your time could be better spent trying to figure out what went wrong in each of these failed relationships, because your problem may not be the type of men you’re attracted to, but the men you’re attracted to.

If there are common denominators between those men from your past, it’s good to know what they are so you don’t get hurt again. In the meantime, keep yourself busy with friends and activities you enjoy. This is an effective way to combat depression and can also give you the opportunity to make new acquaintances.

Dear Abby It was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact dear Abby at: www.DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.