1 in 8 women in the USA will develop breast cancer. Comedian Ophira EisenbergBest known as the host of NPR’s long-running quiz show, Ask Me Anotherone of them. The comedian now wants to debunk the myth that people battling cancer have to do it with a smile and an uplifting Instagram post; especially if they’re doing it for a purpose. others I feel better.

During a friendly and sincere conversation Andrea Miller Opens Up podcast, Eisenberg currently hosts podcast Parenting is a JokeShe opened up about what it was like to experience breast cancer, as well as a public miscarriage, and how those challenges (eventually) translated into her iconic comedy career. What he says is a message for anyone in the midst of serious life turbulence.

Ophira Eisenberg denies being a ‘good’ breast cancer patient

It can be difficult to find levity and positivity in life’s brutal moments, like losing a loved one or dealing with a serious medical condition. Despite her quick sense of humor and ability to make people laugh, Eisenberg admitted to feeling incredibly powerless about her own narrative while battling breast cancer, and shared that at this point in her life, she was able to incorporate this traumatic period into her life through the creative outlets she made — but it wasn’t always this way.

“I was talking recently about how I was a bad survivor,” Eisenberg said. “I wasn’t ‘a smile on my face going through it all.’ I wasn’t even nice to the many surgeons, nurses, etc. who took care of me. I was harsh at times and mean to them because I was so full of anger and fear.”

Eisenberg explained that she realized how much pressure women were under to be “good survivors” and to go through such a devastating experience with their heads held high while also showing grace and patience. But this expectation is unfair, especially considering that fighting breast cancer is a life-changing experience that does not always have a happy ending.

“I felt all of these things as I was going through this, and I thought, ‘There must be people other than me who feel this way. There must be other people who are saying, ‘Don’t tell me to have a positive attitude right now.'”

Now she wants other women to know that they don’t have to post smiling selfies during chemotherapy treatments or post positive statements if they’re not feeling it.

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Courtesy of Ophira Eisenberg

Eisenberg found that his “emotional connection” to his experience came after he was brutally honest about not being the “perfect survivor.”

It took quite some time for Eisenberg to find comfort in incorporating his cancer journey and experience into some of his comedy routines and creative endeavors. Instead of softening the story and having a “phoenix rising from the ashes” moment, he chose to be honest about his attitude and less-than-perfect survival mentality.

“Personally, I’ve learned that when I can actually go, ‘I’ll write about how I’m not great and have thoughts that I’m not proud of’… these are the moments where people then go, ‘Oh my God.’ That’s the connection,” Eisenberg recalled. “The emotional connection is when we talk about the true essence of our struggle.”

Not every challenge can be overcome beautifully and gracefully. It can be complicated at times, but these moments are the most relatable because of how honestly they are portrayed. Even as Eisenberg talked about getting a mammogram, she admitted that while she was grateful to see women on social media cheerfully reminding other women to get preventative checkups at appointments, for her, those appointments caused her great anxiety. Traumatic events experienced in the fight against breast cancer.

“It looks like a torture chamber,” he said. “It’s a crazy mentality and that’s why I don’t take pictures of myself in the room.”

Ophira Eisenberg performs at The Moth, courtesy of Eisenberg

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Miller emphasized how common it is for people to feel anxiety when discussing scary moments.

“I have friends who are breast cancer survivors, and there’s a lot of hugs and high-fives and cheers… but there’s also the scary part of you being honest,” Miller said, noting that it’s not healthy to expect things from people. those who strive to put on a show for others.

Eisenberg also agreed with this view, noting that this struggle does not end with just recovery. For her, mammograms and other screenings are filled with anxiety, although other survivors celebrate after each scan.

Eisenberg also notes that his need to appear strong and positive stems from the fact that he did not tell many people about his illness. Looking back, he explained that his decision to keep it a secret was because he, too, was having a hard time coming to terms with his new reality.

“I was so distraught and I didn’t want to be the one who broke the mood,” Eisenberg said, adding that he didn’t want to have to fight invasive questions and people’s own fears reflected back at him. But now he insists that you need a village of people to support you when you’re going through something this terrible.

There is no such thing as being “perfect” at anything; far from being a perfect cancer patient and survivor. The only thing that can make the situation even remotely bearable, Eisenberg concludes, is having a corner of people who understand you and will be there for you through the ups and downs.

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Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news and lifestyle writer whose work examines today’s issues and experiences.