Evidence suggests that such informal caregivers carry a heavy burden of stress, including conflict with family, financial concerns, lack of personal time, and a constant sense of uncertainty. “The emotional, psychological weight and responsibility of this never ends. “You never take off the caregiver hat,” says Sarah Iselin, president and CEO of Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts. Earlier this year, Iselin spent a week working remotely from Florida to care for her father, who had Alzheimer’s, and her mother, who was recovering from heart surgery.

For women who find themselves in the role of caregiver and More than half of those giving informal care to the elderly are women, This need can also disrupt a career that’s already on the rise, according to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. “When women reach their 50s, they are actually still on an upward slope in their lifetime earnings trajectory. “Men are in decline,” says Nicole Maestas, an economist and professor of health policy at Harvard Medical School. Her research suggests that taking on a caregiving role delays, but does not always derail, career development; It finds that, on average, women are able to normalize their income after the caregiving period ends. “Women are coming back,” says Maestas.

However, navigating the complex challenges and rocky emotional terrain that comes with caregiving while pursuing career growth can be challenging. On the other hand, experts and those involved in caregiving say there are ways to get through this and come out stronger, both personally and professionally.

1. Protect your identity

Alexandra Drane says people who provide informal care may describe themselves as simply a “decent person” or even a “good daughter”, but they often avoid the label “carer”: Co-founder and CEO of ArchangelsA platform that aims to connect caregivers to support resources. But accepting the identifier is an important mindset shift that encourages you to seek out resources. “If you don’t know you’re in the role, you don’t get support for being in the role,” Drane says.

2. Plan ahead

Lisa Murray, president of the Massachusetts Citizens Bank, helped care for her grandmother, father and husband at different times. Today his mother lives with him; He is in good health, but Murray and his sister are planning for his eventual needs. “My sister and I sat down with my mom and finally asked her what she wanted,” Murray says. “Financially we plan for it, emotionally we plan for it.”

It is very important to think ahead. Start a conversation with your parents, spouses, or anyone else you’ll be responsible for caring for someday. If they’re resilient, do your own legwork to identify available resources and options before the crisis, says Mariani. “Emergency planning is terrible planning.”

3. Seek and accept help

“These resources exist, but they are terribly underutilized,” says Drane.

Part of the challenge is finding and making sense of the different options. The Archangels website brings together links to a variety of services and information, and Massachusetts Family Caregiver Support Program Provides advice and assistance in finding necessary resources. Drane also recommends looking into health insurance plans and employee assistance programs you may already be able to get through work, which often include overlooked services like care coordination, legal advice for estate planning, and counseling sessions.

In addition, every municipality in Massachusetts is served by an aging services agency (listed on the Executive Office of Elder Affairs’ website), many of which offer caregiver support groups and resources.

Judy VerPlanck-Elliott, 66, of Methuen, is the full-time caregiver for her husband, who has Alzheimer’s, and speaks regularly with a dementia counselor she found through him. AgeSpanits local agency. “It’s really helped me in certain situations, in challenging situations, when I need to talk to someone who won’t judge me,” VerPlanck-Elliott says.

4. Identify and develop your caregiver skills

Interruption of work outside the home due to care can feel like an obstacle to career advancement. But Murray says caregiving develops a completely new and incredibly valuable skill set. “People who are caregivers are better workers: They multitask, they are driven, they are efficient, they work hard.”

Late last month, Archangels and a group of collaborators Care Badge initiativeallows caregivers to earn a badge (a digital logo that can be displayed on a LinkedIn page, email signature, or resume) that identifies them as a person with these skills and experiences. “You don’t have to hide it; speak loud and proud,” says Drane. “It reframes the act of caregiving.”

5. Speak

While the challenges facing working mothers have been part of the national conversation for some time, the challenges of caring for aging adults are rarely mentioned. “A lot of people are uncomfortable discussing this at work, thinking it could affect how people perceive themselves at work,” says Samantha Brady, a doctoral student at Brown University and a research scientist at MIT AgeLab.

But talking about these experiences is what can spark further discussion and, ideally, change. Blue Cross’s Iselin says it was listening to stories from caregivers that inspired the company to add a new benefit to some Medicare plans for 2025: $600 to spend on services like light cleaning and tech support.

6. Cherish pleasant moments

Those who experience intense caregiving will tell you that the process also brings with it many happy moments, from the satisfaction of giving back to the people who raised you to the connections shared by spending more time together. “The pros are immeasurable,” says Murray.

The benefits can extend to the workplace. Research published this year Journal of Professional Behavior finds this Carers often have to make compromises at work – leaving early or taking on fewer projects – but they may also have better attitudes towards their work as the positive emotional effects of caregiving spill over into their professional lives.

Brady’s research also found that employed caregivers had better mental health than caregivers who did not have outside work. “There’s something (about caregiving) that is almost foundational to the job and provides a different sense of purpose,” Brady says.

Those who have been through this process say that finding ways to hold on to a sense of purpose can be invaluable when caregiving is finally over and you move on to a new phase of life.

“Even during my mother’s worst bout of dementia, I looked forward to those times when I could smile for real,” says Mariani. “There are great things yet to happen.”

Sarah Shemkus is a frequent Globe Magazine contributor. Send comments to: [email protected].