Friendship day is the perfect opportunity to celebrate friendship. Ina Garten’s mashed potatoes recipeand learn How to actually cook a turkey? without causing a kitchen fire. But unlike Thanksgiving, perhaps also known as the time when you can get wine-drunk while your parents take charge of everything the holiday entails, Friendship Day requires a lot more from you.

Even if you’re not a host, there are many things that come with being a guest at Friendsgiving. If you’ve never learned the proper etiquette for your role as a Friendship Day guest, now’s your chance to learn.

From cleaning etiquette to knowing who gets which the restHere’s everything you need to know about how not to be an asshole at this year’s Friendsgiving. Believe me, the last thing you want is to be the subject of discussion at the meeting. group chat the next day.

Experts Featured in This Article

Olivia Pollock is an etiquette and hosting expert Eviteis a digital platform that allows users to send invitations online.

Thomas P. FarleyAlso known as Mister Manners, he is an etiquette expert and keynote speaker.

Friendship Day Etiquette Tips

RSVP now

As a host, there’s nothing worse than not knowing how many people to host for Friendsgiving. That’s why hosting expert Olivia Pollock recommends responding to the Friendship Day invitation as soon as possible. “This helps your host plan the menu and shop accordingly,” he says.

Coordinate the Menu

Whether your host plans to cover the turkey or a few other Thanksgiving themes, it’s always a good idea to create a registration form that guests can specify. What food would they like to bring?. This ensures you don’t end up with five-sided mashed potatoes, says Pollock. With the host’s approval, don’t be afraid to prepare this registration form yourself so you and other guests can decide what to bring.

Be Conscious of Allergies

Be mindful of guests’ allergies when ordering food, says etiquette expert Thomas P. Farley. Of course, you don’t need to adapt the entire menu due to a person’s dietary restrictions, but making small changes to a dish can go a long way. (Make green beans Really Do you need bacon if your friend can’t eat pork?) Also, if you’re a guest with allergies, be sure to bring as much food as you can eat and share, unless there are no other options for you.

Don’t Appear Empty-Handed

Even if the host chooses to throw the entire Friendship Day feast, it’s still not a good idea to arrive empty-handed. “If your host insists you don’t need to bring anything, consider small gestures like breakfast items the next morning or a festive candle. This shows you care and adds to the celebration,” says Pollock. You can also offer to bartend some of them in the evening by bringing them the necessary supplies. apple pie or another fall cocktail staple.

. . . And Don’t Show Up Early

“If you’re on time, you’re late” is a common saying that doesn’t apply to Friendship Days. In fact, it may be better to arrive at the event on time, or even a little late, than to arrive early. Pollock recommends arriving on time or about 10-20 minutes after the start time. “This will give your host some time to complete any last-minute preparations while ensuring you don’t delay the meal,” she adds.

Bring Everything You Need for Your Meal

If the meal you’re making requires a specific serving utensil, be sure to bring said utensil with you rather than expecting your host to have one. And if your dish needs to sit in the oven for a few more minutes before serving, be sure to let your host know ahead of time so they can make room. Basically, make sure your food is ready when you step into Friendship Day; if not ready, plan accordingly with the host.

Be Careful About How Much Food You Offer Yourself

Whether you’re passing plates around the table or serving yourself buffet style, be mindful of the amount of food you take before everyone has time to serve themselves. If a friend has only cooked a small plate of stuffed vegetables, use a single ladle rather than a double ladle; You can always save seconds if there is more filling after everyone has served theirs.

Interact with Others

Friendship is best because you don’t normally have to deal with awkward things small talk with people you don’t care about (It’s Friendsgiving, after all.) But if you don’t know everyone at the table, be sure to introduce yourself and join the conversation. “Friends day is a great opportunity to make new friends,” says Pollock.

Help Clean Up

You’re not in a restaurant. “Always offer to help clean up by clearing dishes, doing dishes, or tidying up the area,” says Pollock. This is not the time to sit in front of your phone and wait for others to answer after you. The faster everyone gets clean, the sooner you can get back to drinking more applesauce.

Don’t Skip for Leftovers

“Don’t ask to take leftovers home, wait for the host to ask if you want to bring home anything in particular,” says Farley. To make this easier, Pollock even recommends bringing your own containers so the server doesn’t have to offer their own personal Tupperware. (But if the host lends a container, be sure to clean it and return it on time.)

Express your gratitude

The most important part of Thanksgiving and Friendship Day is to be thankful. “Don’t forget to toast the host and express your gratitude for having such a great group of friends (both old and new) to share the meal with,” says Farley. Whether you write a card or say it verbally, always, always, always say thank you.

Taylor Andrews (she/her) is the balance editor at PS and specializes in topics related to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With seven years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Before joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.