“You’ve got to be kidding,” Trump said. “Do you want to see me knocking people out backstage?”

“I’m getting so angry, I’m boiling, boiling here,” he continued. “I’m busting my ass with this stupid microphone.”

Trump complained about the microphone for almost four minutes, criticizing the “stupid people” in charge, complaining about how worn out his throat was and complaining that it was set too low. Room Threatened to crack down on contractorssomething he has a date from doing.

“I think the microphone stinks,” he said. in question. “Then we don’t pay the contractor. I say don’t pay the contractor. “Then they write a story and say Trump doesn’t pay his bills and that he’s a bad man.”

At one point, Trump awkwardly moved his head up and down from the empty microphone stand above the podium, presumably to demonstrate how far he had to lean in for the microphone to pick up his voice. But this move looked like something else. “BLOW: TRUMP SIMULATED ORAL SEX ON STAGE!” To read a front page headline From Drudge.

Trump slapped the microphone away, grimaced and continued to complain about having to bend over. “Everybody says there’s something wrong with your back? “What’s wrong with his back?” he said. “They say he is cognitively and physically disabled.”

No joke.